Sleeping through the cold. I am trying to sleep through this cold I have acquired which means that I woke up at 6 this evening with a still-stuffy-nose after dreaming about swollen faces, angry ex-boyfirends, my dog in a cage trapped in the snow, and that same weird summer camp I have been dreaming about for the past year. But still awake, with a cold, and it's already 7.
I want to be a male model. Or I want to be with a male model. I can't decide. Robert "Boyd" Holbrook--has anyone seen this guy? I generally could care less about male models, but seriously, how do people get this good looking? I think I would be willing to fore go the fact that he's probably not that funny, not that smart, and not that intertesting just to hold hands and build forts and take pictures in photobooths and drink long island ice teas with him for a few days.
I don't know if it's that my head is stuffy with a cold and it makes me stupid and slow, or that sometimes things are just like this, but I feel like I am being told stories I don't understand, and I am fearful of writing stories I cannot be a part of, and I worry that the stories I write may not mean anything, and think what if productivity is a fantasy that we have and the leap to its reality is too great for most of us to make, and what if knowing all the "right" people & all the "nice" people the "bright" people is something that makes our tables full at holidays but never helps us learn more & do more, and then I think I am thinking of it the wrong way and I know it will pass in a minute or two but I still won't forget that I've thought it. And how come brilliant people scare me? How come I am affraid to approach them, nervous to talk to them? They are just people. Why do I feel that I don't know how to find what I am looking for and that the looking takes so long? These are cold questions.
I have been hanging out with the man who says "The fish is in the freezer, the whale is on the way" too much and am now thinking in loose foreign metaphors like him. My stories follow nothing, they just open up, let in light, and close into something else, another scene.
This is like robo-tripping without the NyQuil.
The bridge of my nose is bruised from blowing it too much.
I have stories I have to write.
I have bones that want a new project.
I have wants that need patience.
I wish I could breathe through my nose.
2 comments:
I don't know how I stumbled across this blog but I have worked with Boyd in the past (asst. gofer/to head stylist at hugo boss, moschino, etc.) and I have to say your preconceived notion couldn't be further from the truth; Boyd is extremely intelligent and very interesting. Some words to describe Boyd Holbrook: shy, humble, uncomfortable with admiration, intelligent, beatnik, artist, poet, angelic and extremely polite; Boyd is a joy to work with. He doesn't take himself seriously at all. He is currently attending NYU film school where he's pursuing a film degree. Boyd Holbrook is one of the un-modeliest models I have ever met. Yes, he is very good looking ,however, you have to realize there are such things as photoshop and airbrushing; many of the models so-called flaws are removed, lips are made to look fuller, legs longer, lighting brings forth the cheekbones and softens the nose and forehead.
Abanks,
If you ever read this, let me say thank you. It makes me extremely happy to hear such things, and though I did say he probably wasn't funny/interesting/other preconcieved notions about exceptionally attractive people I was speaking, really, about those preconcieved notions. I think it is easy to decide someone could not be many wonderful things all together. Anyway, I'm glad that he's an amazing human being and wether he's photoshopped or not I get the feeling he's still pretty good looking. Better than that though, is his alleged pension for whiskey, which is also my preffered drink, and though I am not a model myself I am quite charming, so perhaps we could talk further, and perhaps it could be over whiskey, and it could involve film, which I have also studied.
Post a Comment