While Sammy Masters Tekken, I...

One of my friends has an agent. I saw this friend a couple of weeks ago, and she told me something which I have been thinking about ever since. She kept saying she was "the best friend". Eventually I learned: the way she started out, her agent told her she was in the "fat bitch" category. She got a personal trainer, and lost 20 pounds. Then her agent told her she had reached "the best friend". She was so pleased about this. She would choose not to eat things, reminding herself, "I am the best friend", and, if she forgot, one of our overly consciencious gay friends would remind her "BEST FRIEND! BEST FRIEND!" "My agent says," she informed me in a business-like demeanor, "If I lose 20 more pounds, I'll become the PROTAGONIST. And I will lose 'best friend" status". And this is the business I want to enter into.
Still, I keep seeing girls on the subway, and moving in droves down the street in Williamsburg, and I keep asking myself, "The Best Friend?'
Agents.


I've got a friend who's got a black chest from a girl he says he won't see anymore. I've got a friend who says she'll never sleep with someone again and is fine the way she is right now. I've got a friend who's making declarations to girls he will probably never meet. I've got a friend who likes to learn the same lessons over and over again. I've got a friend who never calls but probably always thinks about it, and still calls me the same thing. I've got a friend who lies and doesn't know it, and I'm lieing to call him my friend. I've got a friend who settled down, and I think she finally likes it. I've got a friend who rarely speaks to even his best friends and rarely has concerns for himself that I can find.
What are we doing?

I love Tekken. I want to be the superior at Tekken Tag, My hand-eye coordination still leaves much to be desired, but I know I can train well, if I commit. Like the Karate Kid. But more of a girl.

If New York got much hotter I am certain I would start to melt like the candy house in Hansel and Grettel.

I pee about every 15 minutes. I smoke about every 15 minutes. It's a schedule I'm still getting accquainted with.

I'm thinking about what it means to be a pleasent liar when it doesn't hurt anyone. I'm thinking about how I might respect those liars. Or not. I'm thinking about deciding.

Someone told me recently that I am the most selfish person they've ever met. I've been thinking maybe they are right, and that double standards are more confusing than was intially anticipated.

I've been thinking that the Garth Brooks song "The Dance" can go fuck itself, and find someone else to harass in that 12 year old kind of way for a while.

I saw three mice last night. And about 15 cockatroaches. Those fuckers are deffintely breeding.

The common form for Haiku is: 5, 7, 5. And I stand behind this.

Goal: not wake up at two in the afternoon.