One of two things is happening. Either I am only writing blogs when I am drunk, or the only time I have access to the internet is late at night, and I only remember this when I'm drinking. Probably both. So I have gotten in the habit of rereading the things I have written and laughing at my ever embarassing and unique ways of coming up with things to say at three o'clock in the morning. Drinking when I should be sleeping...
After tonight I can say with a fair ammount of certainty that the gay community makes the rest of us straight people look like a group of boring shitheads. Ok, we're not shitheads. We're just boring by comparison. It takes a generous ammount anymore to actually make my jaw drop from an inability to understand, but tonight my mouth was on the table. Despite the fact that I have to wake up at 6:45 in the morning, I found myself sipping large portions of Not So Familiar Gay Boy's Baccardi and coke just because I was so aghast about what was actually taking place. I mean wow. I might as well go home, do a jigsaw puzzle, eat a gingersnap, and re-catalogue my rolodex. Just cash it in. And then marry some ponchy computer teacher named Eugene and learn how to bake casseroles and only have sex, in the missionary position, on hollidays like President's Day. Because after tonight I don't think I can compete.
I would like to hold hands on a date, and pay my bills, and find a nice dress for graduation, and see my friend's final projects, and eat at bbqs, and make my room a room, and buy a ticket to New Orleans to see the Sister, and find good pieces of free furniture, and check out some Olsen action tomorrow when the second Little Bits Olsen comes in to work. But you know, these things are just things.
1 comment:
And it just continued. The text messages, even a revenge video, which unfortunately I couldn't see because me phone is old.
We do do it better.
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